Category Archives: Slasher

Romina (2018)

Romina (2018)

Country: Mexico

Director:  Deigo Cohen

Main Stars:  Francisa Lozano, Arantz Ruiz, Oliver Nara, Claudia Zepeda

Storyline:  A group of teens head out to the woods for camping and slowly get slaughtered one by one after a woman was raped.

Review (Spoils): Ok yes, the storyline from the top screams I Spit on Your Grave (the original always). The film starts with a group of annoying people in a car heading to the camp grounds and making fun of people when really there are the dumb freaks. Before you know they, all have 2 beers and are drunk and horny. Two douche bags head out and spy on a naked stranger in before you know she lures them all to be slaughtered after she is attacked in her tent.

Yes, it one of those films where you cheer for the killer as they are all being slaughter. The problem with the film is all the killing if off scene (I am guessing due to budget) so we only see the after effects. Which is gory but not seeing the acting makes the horror lacking. The ending is a bit strange also but makes sense in the end.  But the characters are all so stupid you want them all to die!

The best scene in the film is the rock to the head scene which was like a GWAR show! The rest is hog ties, stabbings, cut off penis’s, rape, one naked scene in the distance and some missing eyes. Lots of after death scenes.

Rating:  Same old song and dance with this film as we have seen in films like I Spit on Your Grave. The difference is this one does not show any of the gruesome killings, except on time someone is swinging a branch against a tree. The film was not boring but at the same time the characters I hated and could not wait for the film to end.

3/10 Beers!

Yacker

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Death House (2017)

Death House (2017)

Country:  USA

Director:  B. Harrison Smith

Main Stars:  Bill Mosely, Tony Todd, Nicole Cinaglia, Adrienne Barbeau, Kane Holder, Debbie Rochon, Gunnar Hansen, Dee Wallace, Lindsay Hartley, Barbara Crampton, Camille Keaton, Cortney Palm, Sid Haig, Brinke Stevens, Tiffany Shepis, Felissa Rose, Lauren Compton, Beverly Randolph, Sean Whalen, Cody Longo. Lloyd Kaufman

Storyline:  A secret prison has a power outage and all Hell breaks loose when two agents are trapped.

Review (Spoils): Not sure what everyone was thinking with this film, but it became a simple over the top gore mess. The storyline is not very detailed, and it is actually kind of jumbled. We have two agents Condy Longo and Cortney Palm trapped in a prison where a large collection of doctors (including Dee Wallace’s bad hair) has the prisoners trapped with victims that satisfy their needs. Kane Hodder is one of the main prisons badasses and as the power goes out, he starts to lead a front of prisoners.

The film does delivery the bloody goods with slashing, cutting, gun shots, intestines, some weird living zombies gore scene, cheap gas and Satan fire scene and lots of gore. The film is all over the place but we do also get a few glances of Courtney Palm topless but nothing sexy from Debbie Rochon, Felissa Rose, Lindsay Hartley or Laura Compton. (such a missed chance)

Rating:  This is a knocking dead all star cast of horror! There are more names in this film then I can even name when it comes to paying homage to horror. We have the classic villains like Bill Mosely, Tony Todd, Gunnar Hansen, Kane Holder and Sean Whalen to name a few. Over the top gore hound Lloyd Kaufman. And the horror B Queens themselves like Adrienne Barbeau, Debbie Rochon, Dee Wallace, Barbara Crampton, Camille Keaton, Brinke Stevens, Felissa Rose and Lauren Compton just to name a few! But unfortunately it could not save the film from a written mess, it just tried too hard and the finale was kind of boring and lame to the end Hansen that way.  The only thing that made the ending okay was the homage to Gunnar Hansen which was a nice little added touch which made me sad.

3/10 beers!

Yacker

 

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Filed under Cannibal, Slasher, Zombie

Would You Rather (2012)

Would You Rather (2012)

Country:  USA

Director:  David Guy Levy

Main Stars:  Brittany Snow, June Squibb, Jeffery Combs, Sasha Grey, Robb Wells, Enver Gjokaj

Storyline:  A young woman is desperate for money to help her younger brother. She signs up for a game hosted by a sadistic rich man.

Review (Spoils): Young Iris (Brittany Snow) is hungry for money as she needs to look after her younger brother. She does a interview and passes and takes up the interest of getting dressed up and heading to a rich man’s estate to play “Would You Rather” for money. While is there and other guests join she starts to mingle with a few people and we learn that there is a room full of different individuals that all would like to be rich.  As they al, sit at the table they are introduced to the sadistic Shepard Lambrick (Jeffery Combs) who starts the game. Who has the guts to last till the end?

First off, I love Jeffery Combs, so this was going to be good in my head from the get go. Brittany Snow is good looking, and I was interested in her character and than add Robb Wells from Trailer Park Boys and the classic legend herself Sasha Grey! How the hell is this going to be bad? Yes, the film does have a bit of Saw feel to it, but this was a gem that I could not stop watching.

The film was not long which worked very well and got right to the point. Combs rocked as the sadistic asshole that you just wanted to hate. Shepard Lambrick is someone I would love to see again in a sequel. We have tons of awkward gore and blood. People hurting each other for the greed of cash, such as drowning, electrocution, whipping, eye slicing, stabbing with ice picks and even a small bomb taped to hand. This film has it all !!!

Rating:  This film is damn good, and I recommend everyone to check it out if you haven’t as it is little horror gem that I was not aware of. Just wish they didn’t type cast Sasha Grey and her death a little more graphic but anyways …. Check out this Film! The ending is worth it!

7/10 Beers!

Yacker

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Bad Biology (2008)

Bad Biology (2008)

Country:  USA

Director:  Frank Henenlotter

Main Stars: Charlee Danielson, Anthony Sneed

Storyline:  A young man and woman are looking for sexual fulfillment and when they met it turns into a freaky and bloody love story.

Review (Spoils): Ok they only way to review this film is to spoil it so here we go. We have the young beautiful Jennifer (Charlee Danielson) who was born with seven clits, yes, I just said seven! She is impossible to satisfy because of the gender disorder (or is it a blessing?). She is such as fiend sexually and wants to finally be satisfied that sometimes she accidently kills her partners. In due time she comes across a male version much like herself name Batz (Anthony Sneed ). He does not seven penises, but he does have a monster one that goes out at night and kills and cause massive organisms. Okay are you still here?

This film has some of the crazy’s special effects of organs you will see, there is lot of blood and gore, mutant babies, wrestling penises, a jerking machine and some extreme wrongness that I could go on and on. Just watch the damn film! This is a trash classic!

Rating:  If you have no idea who Frank Henenlotter is just walk away as he is one of the gods of horror trash much like Lloyd Kaufman. I personally love the grindhouse trash of horror so of course I am going to enjoy this film as I love to see stuff push the boundaries or wrongness. This is a film which I can say sits well in my collection along with Frankenhooker, Basket Case, Brain Damage or even Nekromantik. Charlee Danielson is beautiful in this film and should be cherished in the world of horror. All Hail the Queen of the 7 Clits!

8/10 Beers! (Trash factor high)

Yacker

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The Plumber (1979)

The Plumber (1979)

Country:  Australia

Director:  Peter Weir

Main Stars:  Judy Morris, Ivar Kants, Robert Coleby, Candy Raymond

Storyline:  A young woman feels she is being stocked by her landlord’s plumber

Review (Spoils): The film starts off as a young working couple are struggling and living in a apartment complex. Jill (Judy Morris) gets interrupted by a plumber ( Ivar Kants) that is doing an inspection, but her landlord has not mentioned anything. Before she knows it, the man makes himself at home and starts to say she has major issues with the pipes.  The young madman starts to take down walls and smash holes in the place and starts to do work that could take weeks. Jill starts to get the weird feeling that he is not leaving.

The film is a typical 70s horror film that does not work on the shock but instead pulls on the feelings of yuck. Yes, the storyline does become almost too bizarre, but it works. The Jill character does become hard to relate too as she is acting a bit silly and to be honest the police should have been involved and landlord from the get go but it all works out in the end.

The problem with this film is, its full of douchbags and really there is not one nice person out of the whole damn group. So, are we on the side of the woman or are we one the side of the psycho who might not be one or are we on the side of the horny friend? I believe this was done on purpose as then it makes the film more like a piece of art instead of just badly played characters who make dumb decisions.

Rating:  This is a hard find and I really did not know much about it until I came across it. I was not expecting much but it did work and kept me entranced to see how this was going to end. Sure, it is not a classic by any means but it was an okay film that gives you that uneasy feeling.

6/10 Beers!

Yacker

 

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Dementia 13 (2017)

Dementia 13 (2017)

Country:  USA

Director:  Richard LeMay

Main Stars:  Julia Campanelli, Channing Pickett, Steve Polites, Marianne Noscheze, Ana Isabelle

Storyline:  A rich family starts to see deaths as they wonder what has happened to one of the sons while honoring the death of the youngest daughter.

Review (Spoils): The Haloran’s family is messed up as they have a very rich upbringing and act like spoiled brats to honor their mother Gloria. As one son disappears when he marries a woman that the family disapproves of things start to get a little bloody as someone is swinging an axe.

Not really sure where to start with this mess, oh ya I hate remakes and the original is a goddamn classic! The film does not try to stay true to the classic and it’s a mess from the being. The acting is lacking and the only going for it is the odd blood scene and the hotness of Ana Isabelle which they fucking killed early in the film! The film is so unrealistic on the way people act and walk around that it was hard to focus on the story. Not too much the haunting background thrown into the mix…. Disaster!

The film gives is a nasty face scratch, dripping and splashes of blood, shitty ghosts, axe swings and a nice axe to the chest (nice chest too by the way). Other than that, just some back and forth and shitty ending.

Rating:  Fuck Richard LeMay for even thinking this was a good idea. Also, should have kept Ana Isabelle till the end. Grab a case of beer and go find the original!

3/10 Beers!

Yacker

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Get Out (2017)

Get Out (2017)

Country:  USA

Director:  Jordan Peele

Main Stars:  Daniel Kaluuya, Allison Williams, Bradley Whitford, Catherine Keener, Caleb Landry Jones, Marcus Henderson

Storyline:  A young black man goes for a weekend to visit his white girlfriends’ family and it does not turn out to be a normal family reunion.

Review (Spoils): Chris (Daniel Kaluuya) and Rose (Allison Williams) heads to her parents place for the weekend for the first time to introduce him to them. He is nervous as Rose has not told them that he is black. Joking with his friend on the phone on the way up they hit a deer with the car and slowly make their way there. From the beginning Rose’s parents are awkward even her nutty brother. As the weekend goes all the family and friends come as Chris starts to feel uncomfortable around them all but when he starts to talk to the black people of the area the truth starts to unravel.

I personally heard a lot of this film but never really got into the details as I did not want to ruin it for myself. The acting is very well done, and the atmosphere of the film is extreme odd and creepy which really makes the film. The whole chunk of the film is the working of is literally Chris trying to find out what the fuck is going on and why Rose’s group of family are so weird.

When it comes blood and guts the film has not a lot to the focus of the seed of the film starts to reveal. We have a few jump scares first and like I said awkward scenes. In the end we see some nice gun shots, nasty bashes to the head, classic ramming of deer head into someone’s chest and neck and an exposed brain. The blood does flow but not till the end.

Rating:  This film was a lot of fun as it was creepy like Children of the Corn with lots of racist undertones. The story has some originality to it which is very hard to find in horror, so it gets huge cheers for that and plus the scarlet Allison Williams is by no means is horrible to look at for the whole film.

8/10 Beers!

Yacker

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Filed under Occult, Slasher