Tag Archives: 4 Beers

The Brain Eaters (1958)

The Brain Eaters (1958)

Country: USA

Director:  Bruno VeSota

Main Stars:  Ed Nelson, Alan Jay Factor, Cornelius Keefe, Leonard Nimoy

Storyline:  A strange cone like object comes out of the ground in a small town and aliens start to overtake people’s minds.

Review (Spoils): Riverdale was a quite place and nothing new really happens there until out of nowhere a strange cone like object comes out of the ground and resides there. As scientist and the government start to poke around and explore this strange ship/ craft thing local people start to act odd and even some die. One thing that can be found is that there are tiny little marks on the back of their necks. What can this mean to the people of this town?

Ok so this is your typical 50s monster movie as it is cheezie and not made to be taken seriously. We have Ed Nelson in the film which is not a surprise as he has done a number of this drive-in monster films. The film does not have gore but does have a semi cool close up of the aliens attaching to the back of the neck. But most of the film is just people poking around the cone and disappearing or becoming overtaken by this puppet master type creature from middle earth.

Rating:  There is nothing that really stands out from this film as they do not get really detailed on the aliens themselves and it is more of the investigation piece of what the hell the cone is and why. We even have a young Spock in the film, Leonard Nimoy. Yes it is not the greatest monster film nor is it really a classic but I imagine it does have some type of cult following.

4/10 Beers! Yacker

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Cry of the Werewolf (1944)

Cry of the Werewolf (1944)

Country: USA

Director:  Henry Levin

Main Stars:  Nina Foch, Stephen Crane, Osa Massen

Storyline:  A young woman is raised by gypsies and she holds the family curse of being a werewolf.

Review (Spoils):  As a local museum starts to share tales of the ancient bloodline of the LaTour family curse, the gypsies decide it is time for the great daughter Princess Celeste (Nina Foch) to cut loose. As the town is haunted with howls, wolf tracks and murder they will do anything to hold the LaTour family secret a secret.

The storyline is basically a police story with some comic relief, a love triangle and some curses and spells. As the gypsies do anything including tormenting Celeste to keep the family curse a secret and kill anyone in the path. And of course, she wants to fall in love also so that thrown into the plot.

The acting is bare bones in this one as sits pretty standard. The plot is a hit and miss as we are not sure what is really going on in the tormented mind of the young Celeste, but we do know she turns into a wold to kill. The werewolf is literally just a wolf running around town howling and killing. The transition is nothing more then a flick of shadow. Do not expect scares or blood much as this is literally people going into hidden tunnels and becomes a love triangle murder mystery.

Rating:  This film was pretty dry to be honest. The acting is ok and it was nice to see Nina Foch back on the screen.  But the werewolf part of the film was lacking as it was just a thin wolf howling and running around. The love triangle part was lame and it took a lot for myself to hold attention to the film.

4/10 Beers!

Yacker

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Amityville: The Awakening (2017)

Amityville : The Awakening (2017)
Country: USA
Director: Frank Khalfoun
Main Stars: Jennifer Jason Leigh, Bella Thorne, Mckenna Grace, Cameron Monaghan


Storyline: A single mother and her family move into the old rumored haunted house. As time goes by the dark senses of the haunting start to affect their comatose son.


Review (Spoils): Joan (Jennifer Jason Leigh) moves her family into the once known around town haunted house. Hell, they even made a movie about it. As she moves her two young daughters (Bella Thorne, Mckenna Grace) and her comatose son (Cameron Monaghan) into the house things start to become disgruntle and weird. The eldest daughter Belle tries her hardest to find out what is going on with the house, why her mother is a nutty bitch, the health of her twin brother and of course being mad at the world. As she makes new friends at school one of them has the actual Amityville Horror film and gives her ideas. Ugh…………..


Ok so let’s start with the good its not a remake and we have Bella Thorn who actual does look great as a goth chick. So that was the good.


The bad for this film is a few things but the main one is … dear mother of god why would you make a film that shows that the first film was just a fucking movie. This is the dumbest idea ever! Total slap to the face to the classic and the series. That alone looses a 6 pack of beer points! Number two the CGI was beyond cheap and lame. The film has minor blood but really nothing special for horror except the typical gun shots.


Rating: Was this film worse than the haunted lamp or clock? No, it was not but the cop out of the lets just watch the movie and figure out what is going on in your house is just beyond dumb! Luckily Jennifer Jason Leigh plays a great crazy mom and Bella Thorne looks amazing as a goth chick. (No really she does!) Other than that nothing much other stands out for this film in the series.

Yacker 4/10 Beers!

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Feral (2017)

Feral (2017)

Country: USA

Director:  Mark Young

Main Stars:  Scott Taylor-Compton, Oliva Luccardi. Lew Temple, Renee Olstead, Brock Kelly, Landry Allbright, Samantha Gangal

Storyline:  A group of young people hike into the woods are attacked by some zombie werewolf type creature.

Review (Spoils): A group of people hiking into the woods for once there are more women then men for once. We have some inter tangle love relationships of the past and some trying to be serious reflection on homosexuality. (fail). We have crazy Talbolt (Lew Temple) running through the woods getting into people’s business as some feral zombie werewolf type creatures roam the woods. After much biting and gun shots we learn Talbolt connection as the disease spreads.

This film gives us bad character connections, bad relationship connections and some bad dialogue. Along with a fail on trying to be serious on homosexuality. But this film does bring on the gore, lots of bites, gut rips, a bear trap, some cool effected on makeup, green eyes and the odd gunshot and ax.

Rating:  Take Wrong Turn and turn it into a zombie film and this is what you get. I hate fast moving zombies but to be honest I almost see this mix of werewolves and zombies, so it worked. What did not work was the cast and story line. But the gore held even though it could of used some nudity come on!

4/10 Beers!

Yacker

 

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The Nun (2018)

The Nun (2018)

Country: USA

Director:  Corin Hardy

Main Stars:  Demian Bichir, Taissa Farmiga, Jonas Bloquet, Bonnie Aarons, Irgrid Bisu

Storyline:  A young nun and a priest with a past investigates a disturbance at a sacred site located in Romania where a nun was found hanging.

Review (Spoils): This storyline and film is a prequel storyline from The Conjuring series. A young nun (Taissa Farmiga) who has not done her final vows is investigating along with a middle-aged priest (Demian Bichir) into why a young nun was found hanging at a sacred site. After venturing off into the forest led by another young man (Jonas Bloquet) who is hired to bring supplies that come to the old ruins. Once within the ruins a lost ancient key led to haunting and demonic possessions that bring forth the dread of the place.

First off, I personally do not understand why the Nun really needed her backdrop story as she could have just stayed with the original series. I personally find the whole Conjuring series becomes a mess as they are trying to damn hard to make this series into multiple eras and storylines when it was fine just on its own.  The whole film is low on character development and focuses way too much on how much can we try to scare the audience with jump scares over and over. Some of the dialogue in the movie is very cheesy and even some of the interaction between the characters are barf worthy. (the lust connection between the two young people). The movie does well when it comes to special effects, I will give it that, but the storyline is dry and could have been told in 20min.

The Nun does give us like I mentioned some cool graphics and effects like the Nun herself (Bonnie Aarons), some cool floating scenes, burning bodies, snakes out of mouths, lots of pentagrams, a beheading, crows munching on bodies, hanging and some cool eye makeup and possessions.

Rating:  The movie did not have to be made and could have been just a side background on The Conjuring series (screams cash grab). The characters were not easy to get into, but the special effects were enjoyable enough to get over the boredom of this film.  The best part of the film is the final scene where the connection is done and to be honest that’s all that could have been done to save time and money. Am I Conjuring fan, sure the series is decent? Do I feel it is a classic no not all? In my 40 years of watching horror films there are way more classics series than this one to cash in on.

4/ 10 Beers!

Yacker

 

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Lifeforce (1985)

Lifeforce (1985)

Country: USA

Director:  Tobe Hooper

Main Stars:  Steve Railsback, Mathilda May, Peter Firth, Frank Findlay, Patrick Stewart, Michael Gothard

Storyline:  After coming across a strange spacecraft in space and bring the specimens back to England they invade the populace as life sucking vampires.

Review (Spoils): A group float up into space and come across an odd shaped space craft. As they explore, they find some floating bat like creatures frozen in time. To make things worse they come across 3 naked people encased in box like crystals. As all great explorers do, they bring them back to the ship and of course the horror begins.

This film is trapped between a sci-fi and wanting to be a horror film sort of like Aliens but nothing like Aliens. The acting is meh and this film did not age well but the first part of the film was interesting. Once the attractive female vampire was loose out in the public is when the film started to lose it storyline and became a bit scattered.

We have the beautiful naked Mathilda May, lots of eye taunting gazes, space, bat creatures, mind reading, more 1980s blue lighting that one film should have, cool life drained zombie vampires and some running vampire zombies. The film does lack on the blood a bit but did I mention Mathilda May?

Rating:  If it was not for the whole naked Mathilda May for pretty much the chunk of the film this may have stunk. She very attractive and her body was well worth watching this film right through as the rest can be a bit of a mess.

4/10 Beers!

Yacker

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Malevolent (2018)

Malevolent (2018)

Country:  UK

Director:  Olaf de Fleur Joahnneson

Main Stars:  Florence Pugh, Ben Lloyd- Hughes, Celia Imrie, Georgina Bevan, Nicola Grier

Storyline:  A young group are scamming people in fake hauntings until they come across the real deal.

Review (Spoils): Brother and sister Jackson and Angela (Florence Pugh) run a scamming like fake setup for hauntings and make a good profit doing. The two of them and their group get hired to check out an old foster home and with Angela’s power they come across the haunting past. Young girls were tortured here, and their mouths stitched shut by the sadistic owner.

If the above plot of a group of people working to scam people in haunting sounds familiar, then you will be like me and give a groan. The originality of this film was lost from the first 10min and I was losing interest which really did hurt this film. The acting was ok but sometimes I do have a hard time with Florence Pugh as she comes across a non-emotional actress which can be dry and over done after a few films.

The film gives is the typical haunting of little girl’s flashbacks, so expect some girls just appearing. The film really does not get into the true horror until about the last 15min when the truth all starts to unravel, and we get to the villains and the heroes. But even then, some of the gore is taken off screen or out of the picture. This is too bad because the scene with the hack saw could have been great. To me Celia Imrie was the highlight of the film.

Rating:  Nothing really new with this film as the topic has been so overdone. There are way better ghost tales out there to check out. This film is forgettable.

4/10 Beers!

Yacker

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First Born (2016)

First Born (2016)

Country:  UK

Director:  Nirpal Bhogal

Main Stars:  Antonia Thomas, Luke Norris, Thea Petrie

Storyline:  A child is born but it leads to a dark entity that haunts the family.

Review (Spoils): When young Charlie (Antonia Thomas) finds out she is pregnant she was not sure what to expect. She tells her boyfriend James (Luke Norris) and they start a new life together. The pregnancy starts to show signs that something is not normal (like claw marks on the belly) and once baby Theo is born things go to Hell. James reaches out to his estrange father who just happens to know about occult. Some strange rules are explained to them form the discovery, like not allowing Theo to have an actual toy doll with a face as she is surround by evilness. Theo gets older and learns to control the strangeness by lying in a circle with candles and yada yada until the evil starts to get out of control.

So that is the simple part of the plot of this story line. As the movie moves it get way more confusing as they add more people who have occult experience into the film. I think they did this to help clarify the reasoning but to be honest it literally confuses the fuck out of the story. I was lost at some point because it stopped to make sense or even lost its reality. Yes, the movie was done on a lower budget but in this one its not the effects that failed but the script. The doll face was an example of “really that seems dumb” and the haunting itself were not overly shocking and you can tell its going to happen before it even does as its cliché.

 

Rating:  The title is confusing even as there are several films that fall under this category that it had me wondering if I already seen this film? So, the story is not overly new, and the story line is a bit of mess and the scares are not that original. So overall you could skip this one and you would not know the difference. Also, the scene at the beginning with the drinking and barfing and whatever in the alley that was too long of scene and pointless really, but maybe I am old and sooner drink alone.

4/10 Beers

Yacker

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The Rezort (2015)

The Rezort (2015)

Country:  UK

Director:  Steve Barker

Main Stars:  Dougray Scott, Jessica De Gouw, Claire Goose, Elen Rhys, Martin McCann

Storyline:  Tourists get to go to an island and shoot zombies, but things go wrong.

Review (Spoils): After a zombie outbreak and the people are in control of the world again. A company decides that they can setup an island and place the undead there so that people can pay to go out and shoot the zombies in the so called wild. They call this a Zafari and when a group of young individuals decide to go out all hell breaks loose when the security fails.

The film had an idea and it could have been like another spin off the Night of the Living Dead Romero’s movies, but it did not build enough backstory. It jumped way to fast into what it is now and get to the island and start to shoot zombies. The characters did not have enough time in the story to build that you cared and really many them are idiots or assholes. So, you did not root for them nor cared if they got eaten. As the Wilton (Claire Goose) struggles because the security has been breached and the zombies start to go out in the wild and attack the paid tourists she hits the security system which is blow up the damn island.

Zombies with good special effects and make up was shocking done well for a lower budget film but that was about it. Zombies should not be able to run! Plan and simple stop it now! We have blood, some bites and way to many gun shots for my liking in a horror film. The acting was okay but the characters were very lacking and made some shitty decisions which I had a hard time to handle.

 

Rating:  Basically, the whole the film is zombies running around (literally running sigh) and attacking people as they try to escape one by one and shoot them. I personally am not a fan of running zombies at all and also not a big shoot them up movie guys, so this film was not winning my attention from the get go. But we had two cuties in the film Jessica De Gouw and Elen Rhys so that held my attention enough for the review as the rest was just okay. By the way the ending….. just ended.

4/10 Beers!

Yacker

 

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Die Monster Die! (1965)

Die Monster Die! (1965)

Country:  UK

Director:  Daniel Haller

Main Stars:  Boris Karloff, Nick Adams, Freda Jackson, Suzan Farmer

Storyline:  A wheelchair bound scientist brings on evil to his estate when he welcomes a green glowing meteorite

Review (Spoils): Nahum Witley (Boris Karloff) has no idea what he has brought to his house when discovers a meteorite and see’s a as a godsend. When a young man visits his girlfriend Susan (Suzan Farmer) to her estate with her wheelchair bound father we learn all is not as it seems. The mysterious Letitia (Freda Jackson) lies behind a curtain in her bed and the staff are dropping dead. But Nahum has kept the great rock locked in the basement where it can glow and present such glory to the family.

While watching the film I was not sure what to expect but it had a Hammer feel to it. When the movie starts to go about half way through there was some stuff in that surprised me that I felt Evil dead took from. The plant over taking Susan and the ending with Letitia and the melting head. The movie has some goo, lots of green glowing and even some cheesie special glowing man effects.

Rating:  This film was more sci-fi than an actual horror film. But Boris and Suzan Farmer dragged me into the film to check it out. Plus, it had monster in the title. The movie is a bit silly at times and even laughable towards the end, but I did like the parts that reminded me of the Evil Dead.

 

4/10 Beers!

Yacker

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