Tag Archives: 4 Beers

Rings (2017)

Rings (2017)

Country:  USA

Director:  F. Javier Gutierrez

Main Stars:  Matilsa Anna Ingrid Lutz, Alex Roe, Johnny Galecki, Vincent D’Onofrio, Aimee Teegarden, Bonnie Morgan

Storyline:  A school study of the soul leads back to the tape and the history of Samara’s mother

Review (Spoils): The film opens with the storyline of Gabriel (big surprise on the name played by Johnny Galecki) talking students one by one to watch the tape so that he can the be shot of the discover of the soul. This leads the young Julia on a hunt for her missing boyfriend as he watched the tape. She confronts the teacher and a fellow student named Skye (Aimee Teegarden) and starts to learn that there is more to this than finding her boyfriend.

This film started off actually okay with the school storyline and the babe Aimee Teegarden but then it started to run off the rails as they hunt for the body of Evelyn, Samara’s mother. Once you get the point of priest so the movie runs into a sadness of boredom and no shit Sherlock! The idea was great at the beginning as it gave the series a bit of a Hellraiser type feel and then it just became another generic too much information on the history storyline. The marking on the hand also was a bit of stretch.

We have videotapes, electronic format now of the video, Samara, black wet hair, car wreck, some blood, screaming, a little okay scene of hair out of the mouth, Samara coming out of laptop and of course lots of flashy scenes of the video. Not much on the scares as a lot of it has been done before.

Rating:  Like stated above this film had a great idea and storyline and then it went lazy. It took the easy way out and started to tell a tale that nobody really gives a rat ass about. Whole series has been around Samara we do not need a huge storyline why her mother treated her like crap and killed her. Plus, you killed Aimee Teegarden near the beginning of the film. Eye candy gone and shitty change in storyline makes this film lacking.

4/10 Beers!

Yacker

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The Bye Bye Man (2017)

The Bye Bye Man (2017)

Country:  USA

Director:  Stacy Title

Main Stars:  Douglas Smith, Lucien Laviscount, Cressida Bonas, Jenna Kanell, Marisa Echeverria, Cleo King

Storyline:  Some young friends learn and unleash a nightmare horror and learn about the false visions they are witnessing.

Review (Spoils): Three friends moving into a Campus house, mess around with the occult, and unleash a nightmare horror known as the By Bye Man. The story goes that the Bye Bye Man will kill and haunt whoever learns his true name. The friends work together trying to keep the boogie safe and the friends safe.  As people learn, about the secret they start to see visions, the Bye Bye Man, and his nightmare dog (something from Hellraiser) come to visit them.

OK this film is a mess on a number ways. I could not relate with the young characters at all and really could not care less if they were killed.  Sure, we have visions and are not sure what is real and what is not. Some of the scenes were interesting like the one with the sex scene and the train scene but the special effects are somewhat lacking on budget. The main villain I just could not get into as he looks like something from Harry Potter and the dog was just dumb. The film has creepy parts but most the film I was just bored. Some blood, lame CGI, train smash, some bats and stabs, gunshots, some doggie style sex and some silly looking bad guys. But the storyline was lame and the acting was sub par. There just was not enough excitement to keep me glued to the screen. I was expecting a fun new bad guy instead I got some teenage crap.

Rating:  I could not care this villain if he returned. The film is so focused on young people and silly drama that the horror got lost. Like stated above some of the vision scenes were fun and the back story of the dude shooting up everyone was also entertaining but way too much talking for a horror film. Thank god for Jenna Kanell to keep me glued to the screen for a little bitI say don’t say the Name of this film!

4/10 Beers!

Yacker

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Insidious 3 (2015)

Insidious 3 (2015)

Country:  USA

Director:  Leigh Whannell

Main Stars:  Dermot Mulroney, Stefanie Scott, Angus Samspon, Lin Shaye

Storyline:  A prequel on the storyline where Elise Rainier uses her abilities to talk a dead mother for a young teenage girl.

Review (Spoils): Quinn (Stefanie Scott) is a young teenage girl who lost her mother and she wants to communicate with her. Therefore, she reaches out to psychic Elise Rainer (Lin Shaye) to help her with that. During which Rainer comes across the dark side of the after life and could not provide what Quinn was looking for. Quinn heads home, deals with normal teenage life, and is hit by a car. She dies in a way but is brought back to life. During which because she crossed over and messed with Rainer things start to go weird for her.

First off, I really dislike it when films think it is smart to go back in time for a sequel. This story really did not need to be told and I had an issue with that. Do not get me wrong the acting from both female leads Lin Shaye and Stefanie Scott was great but the film felt like it was a lighter side of Insidious tale. Mother and daughter bond was it too mushy for taste in a horror film.

Same story when it comes to graphics on this one, ghosts, dreams, red and black man, some spooky old man that cannot breath, the old lady in black and a motherly ghost that watches over her daughter. The coolest scene of the film was when Quinn smashes the casts off her legs.

Rating:  This film be prepared to wait for something to happen. Excessively much story line on just the teenage girl and her drama of coping with the lost of her mother and having to pick up the slack. It drags on way to long for a horror film that belongs to series that is suppose to scare. This film was too predictable and too corny for my liking. I want creepiness and new types of scares at this day and age. This one is old hat.

4/10 Beers!

Yacker

 

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Cult of Chucky (2017)

Cult of Chucky (2017)

Country: USA

Director:  Don Mancini

Main Stars:  Allison Dawn Doiron, Alex Vincent, Brad Dourif, Fiona Dourif, Michael Therriault, Jennifer Tilly

Storyline:  Nica is placed in a hospital where past Chucky victims rest. With the help of Tiffany, Chuck comes to the hospital to pay some respect.

Review (Spoils): Nica (Fiona Dourif) is accused of murdering her family, as nobody believes her that the doll did the killing. The patients in the hospital she is located are all past victims (including Andy from the first films) and they are believed to be illusions of the mind.  While this is going on the staff at the hospital are actually starting a cult dedicated to the devilish doll but Tiffany has other plans to help Chucky out.

This film starts almost right after the last one but it does start a bit confusing.  Nica’s part make’s sense but dragging Andy (Alex Vincent) in from the beginning makes the film confusing. That is a fault of the film it is kind of jammed together without real thought. The gore and blood is there but limited.  Do not get me wrong it was nice to re-introduce Andy but it was done wrong and should have been brought in near the end as a surprise. Brad Dourif, Fiona Dourif and Jennifer Tilly did a great job returning as their characters but the story itself was all over the place. The Cult part was misleading and was not really explained.

We have knives, drills, burnt dolls, many jumbled dream sequences, some blood and a nasty head smash. Other than that just a lot of dialogue and character introduction without any real detail.

 Rating:  Personally had hope for this series as the last film was not bad and I enjoy the Nica character. However, this story is fucked and to be honest the whole Tiffany (Jennifer Tilly )character seems fake in this film but I did enjoy the twist ending. Holding still hope that this series will get back to the horror and drop the comedy.

4/10 Beers!

Yacker

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Isle of the Dead (1945)

Isle of the Dead (1945)

Country:  USA

Director: Mark Robson

Main Stars: Boris Karloff, Ellen Drew, Marc Cramer, Katherine Emery

Storyline: On a Greek island during the war people are quarantined on the island due to a plague

Review (Spoils): During the war of 1912, people are trapped on an island located on the side of Greece. Legend and tales from a peasant woman is spread that there is a haunting presence of an undead spirit vampire known as the vorvolaka. The people on the island are told by the general (Boris Karloff) that they cannot leave due to a plague that is causing people to feel ill, weak and then slow death. The battle of legend and politics starts to happen between the people on the island as the sickness spreads. Does the faith in the goddess over power the tales of the spirit of evil.

The setting of this film is well done as it builds the backdrop of the war and the environment of the island. We have Boris Karloff not playing really the monster in this case but instead the hardheaded general who is trying to protect the people but at the same time contain the plague. Katherine Emery plays the part of the woman who fears of being buried alive which does come to terms within the film.  Of course, we have the lovely Ellen Drew playing the lead woman who may or may not be a vorvolaka spirit.

Rating: This is actually not a bad film but there is something that is missing from the formula. Not sure if it was because they did not get into the details of the haunting evil spirit idea or it was lacking scares. Ellen Drew was great and of course so was Boris Karloff but something when it came to the horror of the tale was missing. Except of course, the scene of live person in a coffin scratching is a nice touch.

4/10 Beers!

Yacker

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XX (2017)

XX (2017)

Country:  USA

Director: Roxanne Benjamin, Karyn Kusama

Main Stars: Natalie Brown, Jonathan Watton, Peter DaCunha, Melanie Lynskey, Breeda Wool, Angela Trimbur, Christina Kirk, Sheila Vand

Storyline: An anthology of horror and haunting which has female leads.

Review (Spoils): This film is broken down in four short films, which focuses on female leads in each.

The first tale called The Box, which is the stronger one of the tales. We have the beautiful Natalie Brown who plays the mother of small family and her son meets a stranger on a bus that shows him a red box. Never shown what is in the box he starts to starve himself and the secret starts to spread through out the rest of the family.

The second tale called The Birthday Party is more of fun tale of a mother who is trying to balance the death of her husband and her daughter’s birthday party on the same day. This is actually a funny tale and the giant panda was a nice touch.

The third tale is called Don’t Fall, a short tale and more unclear 1 where a small group travel into the wilderness and they come across an ancient occult symbol on a rock. One of the women becomes possessed and make short work of her friends.

The very last story is called Her Only Living Son, which is a weaker story of a single mom, and her love for her strange son who turns out is the son of Satan.  Not bad story but was lacking on the scares and humor of the other tales.

Rating: Not the best film of short horror tales as there was a serious lack of blood and guts and the scares was just not there. The first couple were okay but then the second half of the film fell flat. The first tale was the strongest and actually could have made a neat movie on its own. Not a bad batch and worth checking out if you are out of ideas on what horror to watch.

4/10 Beers!

Yacker

 

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Slumber Party Massacre II (1987)

Slumber Party Massacre II (1987)

Country:  USA

Director: Deborah Brock

Main Stars: Crystal Bernard, Jennifer Rhodes, Kimberly McArthur, Juilette Cummins, Heidi Kozak, Cindy Eilbacher, Atanas Ilitch

Storyline: The younger sister of Valeria has a feeling the haunting of the driller killer still exists.

Review (Spoils): Smoking hot Courtney (Crystal Bernard) has grown up since the first film and keeps having nightmares of that bloody night when the drill killer came to town and killed a batch of teenage girls. She keeps dreaming and seeing her older sister warning her about the drill killer, sex and other fun stuff as she and her friends plan a get together to party, play music and do just that. Just when her friends start to think, she is nuts the drill killer comes and brings on the bloody tunes.

I am going to first start off when I was young I had a TV crush on Crystal Bernard and for that; I cannot not like this film. This film has nudity, blood, hot chicks, an Andrew Dice Clay killer (Atanas Ilitch) with a drill on his guitar, sex dolls, 80s partying and some cheesy dance moves what is there not to like! We have some bad special effects, blood, plastic body parts and 80s love.

Rating: I loved the first film a lot and this one it not like it at all but…. It is so bad and worth drinking too that you cannot dislike it. Its screams B movie and screams hormones! Therefore, I was disappointed that this film did not score as great as the first one and became so damn cheesy and low dollar. In addition, it has Crystal Bernard and Crystal Bernard in a bikini…. You will need beers to survive this film.

4/10 Beers!

Yacker

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