Tag Archives: 5 Beers

The Werewolf (1956)

The Werewolf (1956)

Country: USA

Director:  Fred F. Sears

Main Stars:  Don Megowan, Joyce Holden, Eleanore Tanin, Steven Ritch

Storyline:  A young man has forgotten everything and wanders the countryside killing and looking for help.

Review (Spoils): As a man (Steven Ritch) kills someone who was trying mug him and leaves traces as of an animal the moron sheriff (Don Megowan) of the town is on the case. As he gets his men of the town to help him hunt down the killer, a young woman and her son are looking for her lost husband who was last heard of from a car accident and met some doctors. (no idea why she is so calm and know so much but anyways). While hunting down this man/wolf creature the missing man comes back and asks for help which just happens to be another doctor and the father of the sheriff love interest (Joyce Holden). The chain of events in this film are shocking! (not think on plot here). The rest of the film is everyone chasing down the werewolf and firing a pile of guns.

This film’s plot/story line is pretty thin and the dialog to be honest is funny and great. The sheriff alone with his actions is comical. The love interest is funny also because she is so gentle and really you can feel no connection between the two even though it is supposed to be there. The best part of the whole film though is the werewolf make up. This part I am serious it was great for its time and fun to watch the drool.

We have lots of crazy gun fire, bear trap, some claw marks and blood on the snow. Some interesting hairy hands and face make up and tons of drool!

Rating:  Outside of the laughable film this is actually entertaining and not a terrible werewolf film for kicks. I could see this having a small cult following, and it was nice fun little classic monster gem to find.

5/10 Beers! Yacker

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Boogeyman II (2007)

Boogeyman II (2007)

Country: USA

Director:  Jeff Betancourt

Main Stars:  Danielle Savre, Matt Conen, Chrissy Calhoun, Mae Whitman, Renee O’Connor, Tobin Bell

Storyline:  A young woman now has the fear of the legendary boogeyman and has checked herself into a mental facility to get over her fears.

Review (Spoils): Young Laura (Danielle Savre) has had this demon like fear of the boogeyman.To overcome the fear, she is instated into a mental hospital (big surprise here) as she tries to battle and overcome her fears. She has had this fear since she was child so what makes sense but to check yourself in right? What makes things worse for Laura is the staff are all morons and the doctor is scary as hell (Tobin Bell). As she goes through the change of events and fears and meets more people with fears and phobias such as germs and the dark, we learn that the boogeyman has followed her there.

If you have watched the first one, well god bless you as it was not very good. I believe I gave it 2 beers because it was so damn painful of CGI. This film goes a totally different direction and which to me is a good thing. Now is this film amazing no not really as you feel a tad disappointed with the outcome as it is literally just a chasing game and follows a bit of the Nightmare on Elm Street vibe minus the wise cracks. Yes, there is some skin in the film and even some decent blood and gore without the crap of lame CGI. But it still did not deliver the full goods.

Rating:  This film is hard to rate and why without spoiling it, but the acting was not bad as I have seen a hell of a lot worse. Not as supernatural film as you would think but much better than the first film as it was complete garbage. You have some nudity and some cool death scenes and I believe there might even be an ode to Saw with Tobin Bell in this film.

5/10 Beers! Yacker

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Polaroid (2019)

Polaroid (2019)
Country: USA
Director: Lars Klevberg
Main Stars: Kathryn Prescott, Tyler Young, Samantha Logan, Keenan Tracey, Priscilla Quintana, Katie Stevens


Story line: A young photographer gets an old polaroid camera from a friend that seems to be haunted.


Review (Spoils): Young Bird (Kathryn Prescott) is a photographer fanatic and does not sit well with others are school as she has a scar that she keeps covered up around her neck. Her friend brings her a used old Polaroid camera as a gift, and she is amazed. He found it at an old yard sale. Through time as she is taking pictures of friends something strange starts to happen.

When they burn the picture, they learn that whatever is in the picture in order of the flame it happens directly to the person. This leads to craziness that has a shadow that moves from picture as a haunting ghost stalks them. This camera is beyond haunted!


Not to ruin or spoil anymore of the story line and movie this film is thick in back story. As crazy as it s sounds I actually liked the storyline and it started to become interesting. Also, for once these young people are not annoying and there was some decent character build.


If I loved, it so much why the low score of pints? Well the special effects are painful! This film had some much going for it and they ruined it by cheeping out by using god damn CGI. Fire/flames always looks like crap in CGI and a lot of the deaths in this one did look bad and cheesier. This hurt the film very badly!


The film gives is some sword armed CGI haunting man, fires, a hole through the hand (lame), crunched up bodies, gun shots, some jump scenes, lots of pictures being taken, off scene deaths and more CGI cheese that just ruins the film. You want to love the villain as a memorable horror creature, but you just can’t with these effects. Its all just too bad.


Rating: Overall for the story line and acting this film is worth checking out if you can ignore the bad special effects. Great job Kathryn Prescott.

5/10 Beers!

Yacker

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14 Cameras (2018)

14 Cameras (2018)

Country: USA

Director:  Seth Fuller, Scott Hussion

Main Stars:  Zach Dulin, Kodi Saint Angelo, Neville Archambault, Chelsea Edmundson, Lora Martinez-Cunningham, Brytnee Ratledge, Amber Midthunder, Brianne Moncrief, John-Paul Howard, Gavin White, Hank Rogerson

Storyline:  Gerald is back but this time setting up more then just cameras he is selling on the internet.

 

Review (Spoils): A young couple rent an AIRBNB which unfortunately is owned by creepy Gerald (Neville Archambault) as he is back to his old games of filming people. As things start to get boring for Gerald, we learn that another couple with their young teen kids’ setup also in the rented resort. Things start to unfold as Gerald starts to market on the filming of the cameras. When young Junior (Gavin White) starts to catch on what old Gerald is up too things start to unfold.

The film starts as creepy as the first and things start to seem much like the first film. About mid way this start to unfold when Junior is introduced (which to me seems flawed) and we learn a bit of background on why pervert Gerald does what he does. This is a good thing and it makes sense and builds more character someone who is already a pretty dirty creepy man. But the when he starts to let things become personal that’s when the story goes sideways and starts to go off the rails. The whole kid storyline kind of ruins the film and it loses it greatness of the first film had.

We have some light nudity, cameras, dirty Gerald, the hotness of Kodi Saint Angelo and Amber Midthunder, gunshots, duct tape and lots of cheesy teenage drama. This film lacked a bit of what made the first one so great.

Rating:  Neville Archambault was great again as a creepy dirty villain but the backstory of him got to detailed and it started to ruin what I loved about him. If they would of written the kid out and the annoying jogger chick this film might of gotten a higher rating. The film did okay in my books but not great thank god for Neville Archambault, Amber Midthunder and Kodi Saint Angelo or it would have been a tad worse. But I will still hold out for another from this series.

 

 

5/10 Beers!

Yacker

 

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A Page of Madness (1926)

A Page of Madness (1926)

Country: Japan

Director:  Teinosuke Kinugasa

Main Stars:  Masuo Inoue, Ayako Iljima, Yoshie Nakagawa

Storyline:  A man works at an asylum hoping he can free his wife from there.

 

Review (Spoils): a man takes a janitor job at the asylum in hopes of working his way towards his wife’s freedom from there as she was placed there after her attempt of suicide. The twisted film of dance and music and strange images of distorted faces drives the audiences into the mad mind of the wife.

This film has no blood, no true scares and from what I know music was added the film at a later date on the original. This silent film has no narrative written at all, so you really need to watch the facial expressions and action to understand what is happening (I prefer this actually). The film plays mostly on the husband working his way to the cell of his wife as we are offered flashbacks of her past and what happened along with a number of other characters that are trapped in the mental hospital. The visuals of the film are strange flashbacks which you really need to keep track and of the camera shots look like they were done through a jar. The music of the film was a great added touch as I personally feel that without the score going on in the background this film could have been a mix of confusion.

Rating:  The things to remember of this film is that there is not a lot of movies from Japan of the era that survived the war and destruction, so it is nice to have what we do in horror. The movie is not bad even though the entrancing dancing could have been overdone and distracting. But the added music to bring in the strangeness and madness of the film is nice added touch and some of the camera work like the visuals of the masks and faces was extremely well done and art in its own. This is film is not going to be for everyone who enjoys horror but if you do enjoy the silent era and films with more of artist feel this is a lost gem.

5/10 Beers!

Yacker

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The Crucifixion (2017)

The Crucifixion (2017)

Country: UK

Director:  Xavier Gens

Main Stars:  Sophie Cookson, Corneliu Ulici, Ada Lupu, Brittany Ashworth, Ozana Oancea

Storyline:  A young writer investigates a story around a nun that died at the hands of exorcism

 

Review (Spoils): Young Nicole (Sophie Cookson) goes on a writing adventure as she tries to grab and investigate the story behind a priest and number of nuns being convicted of murder of a thought of one of their own being possessed. This leads to a chase to Rome where she starts to interview everyone involved so that she can get the story.  As she starts to look into Father Anton (Corneliu Ulici), she learns more about the events and the possibility of the demon being real and still out there.

The film scenery is good, and the storyline actual is not flawed. The characters within the church are built up well and the acting is not as bad as I thought but there are some issues with the main character the journalist. The acting was meh and she just was not believable for the part of the one looking into everything. Yes, she is cute but she kind of ruined the film as the story had so much potential around the madness of Maricica Irina Cornici. I believe this is the same back story as The Exorcism of Emily Rose (which I loved).

The film does not really give us anything new except the spider scenes which are actually pretty interesting. We have blood, black eyes, eye rolls, floating bodies and of course a falling out the window body. Everything else around the film is focused on storyline which can be long winded and the typical scares that are not that scary.

Rating:  Two problems which this film is the acting of Sophie Cookson and nothing really new out of the typical exorcist type film. The storyline like I have repeated few times is not bad and it is worth a view if you can get past Sophie Cookson. But do not expect anything new and refreshing outside of the spider scenes.

5/10 Beers!

Yacker

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Jigsaw (Saw VIII) (2017)

Jigsaw (Saw VIII) (2017)

Country: USA

Director:  Michael Spierig, Peter Spierig

Main Stars: Matt Passmore, Tobin Bell, Callum Keith Rennie, Hannah Emily Anderson, Laura Vandervoort, Cle Bennett

Storyline:  Several bodies are found could the Jigsaw killer be back from the dead?

Review (Spoils): Bodies start to turn up around the city and killed in unique ways this opens the police investigation to see if the Jigsaw killer is back from the dead.  After looking into who is doing the killing and how is it possible the police and detectives start to track it down that Jigsaw is back or there is a copy killer out there.

So back to the Saw series and yes, I have not reviewed them all in order yet. This one is a little slower on the pace and at first, I was not sure about it. The film jumps right into who are the players and the game of death. Which is fine as this has been done pretty much with all the movies of the series. We have some detectives that are trying to track down who is the Jigsaw killer or is he back from the dead. As this is going on we learn about Logan (Matt Passmore) who works as mortician and his redheaded partner Eleanor (Hannah Emily Anderson).   The story bounces back and forth from a group that are being tested and killer one by one by the fancy traps set by the killer and the police investigation. But unlike the others of the series this one does struggle with a few items.

First off the traps and puzzles in this one just seemed dumb and lazy overall. There was nothing that really screamed cool. We have lots of needles, chains around necks, buckets over the head, a strange motorcycle setup, some buzz saws, acid in the head, shotgun to the face, nasty leg cut, a slicer and a stupid laser cutter scene. Way too many needles in this one that I could not even count them all. Yes, there is blood and gore, but the Jigsaw traps just seemed dull. Secondly what in the dear god happened to Hannah Emily Anderson! Her acting in this was horrible or maybe it was just the character not being believable. Thank god she is easy on the eyes as she drove me nuts with her fake dialogue. What a car wreck!

What kind of worked was Anna (Laura Vandervoort) who is very hot but can entertain. Her character was great and the storyline behind her is great. She and the great Tobin Bell as Jigsaw was worth the watch.

Rating:  The series is running out of steam and should just close soon. The kills are lame, and the storyline seems to be in a loop. Really how many times can they use the same hook. The one scene with the falling weapons in the grain silo was enough to make me scream at the screen on how stupid these puzzles can be but then it hit a even lower low with the final death scene with the laser cutter and the cheesy CGI. Really too bad as it had some babies and it use to be a daring and unique series.

5/10 Beers!

Yacker

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Wish Upon (2017)

Wish Upon (2017)

Country: USA

Director:  John R. Leonetti

Main Stars:  Joey King, Ryan Phillippe, Ki Hong Lee, Mitchell Slaggert, Shannon Purser, Sydney Park, Elisabeth Rohm, Joesphine Langford, Alexander Nunez, Daniela Barbosa

Storyline:  A teenage girl was given a box from her father and it unlocks, and grants wishes.

Review (Spoils): Young Clare (Joey King) is a misfit and does not fit with in the in crowd. When her embarrassing father delivers a special box and she figures how to unlock its secrets it grants 7 wishes. Of course, as a young teenager she is selfish in her wishes and because of that it comes with a horrible price.

This film plays off the characters of misfits and a small group of individuals that do not fit in with the in crows at school. When the main character Clare abuses the power of the box and starts to use the wishes there are deadly consequences.  Picture the deaths along the lines of the Final Destination series, which the mix of Wishmaster for the grant wish part (minus the djinn) and Hellraiser as the box has a puzzle box feel to it. There you go you have the Wish Upon movie!

The film gives some nasty kills that is for sure like stabs through the eye, a nasty garage disposal death, elevators that crash, car hits, some nasty fungus of death and other weird deaths and pains of the world. Basically, the film is the main character trying to fit and drops all her friends and other with the wishes of her selfish need. The film screams teen drama.

Rating:  The idea was okay but stolen from past big names series and the death scream influence from the Final Destination films. Did it hurt the film? A little to be honest as it seemed like a bit of a copy cat. We could have used a little more of Joesphine Langford but I was interested to see how this film was going to end and was not upset with the ending to be honest. Joey King did do a great job as the main character but when it came to the wishes it did seem out of character when it came to be waiting to be popular. Its worth a watch as there is a Hell of lot worse out there in horror.

5/10 Beers!

Yacker

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Blair Witch (2016)

Blair Witch (2016)

Country:  USA

Director:  Adam Wingard

Main Stars:  James Allen McCune, Callie Hernandez, Corbin Reid, Valorie Curry, Wes Robinson, Brandon Scott

Storyline:  Again, a videotape has been found with and some young people are missing that were wandering in the deep forest that is haunted.

Review (Spoils): In the Black Hills Forest tales of a haunting has been legendary. James (James Allen McCune) wants to finally put to rest his sister Heathers disappearance on the woods. A team of young people being led by James kind of head into the woods during the day to find out if the stories are true about what exists in the woods. As they travel deeper and get lost in the maze and night starts to fall, they all start to lose their sanity.

Once again, a tape has been found which bring a young back on a hunt for his missing sister from 20 years ago. The storyline of this one has not changed much from the original, but it is okay to burn 1.5 hours. Sure, the young people are super annoying and do stupid things and think they are all super cool and tough but really the scares are the same as before.

We have a dark forest, shaky camera action that you have no idea what the fuck is going on, people staring in the corner of the room (but this is explained so that was nice), lots of yelling, cool witch tokens hanging on trees, mud and some flashing lights. Nothing out of the ordinary with this film at all.

Rating: Not sure why this film was made and the reasoning it needed to be told but it was nice connection to the first one, but it did not stray from it at all.  The characters were super annoying except for Callie Hernandez as she is hot. The scares were limited and looking back maybe this could be watched again as a drinking game when someone name is called. Or if there is a group of you each choose a name and drink too it.

5/ 10 Beers!

Yacker

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Night Monster (1942)

Night Monster (1942)

Country:  USA

Director:  Ford Beebe

Main Stars:  Bela Lugosi, Lionel Atwill, Leif Erickson, Ralph Morgan, Irene Hervey

Storyline:  A rich recluse invites doctors to come to his mansion located in the swamp to meet their deaths.

Review (Spoils): Crippled Kurt Ingston (Ralph Morgan) lives in the swamp with his daughter Margaret. Her sanity is being checked as she is acting strange but seems healthy. All the doctors that have been assigned to her and her father are invited to the lonely mansion located in the swamps. During the visit one of the doctors end up murdered and they must track down the killer before more die.

I personally started off this film picturing this to be a monster film staring Bela Lugosi, wow was I wrong. He is barely in the film and plays a secondary part in the film as a spooky butler. Instead the film becomes a murder mystery surrounding around the mysterious Ingston family and the medical professionals that were involved with them. The film is dark and has lots of fog as that is what you get when you live in the swamp. The sound effects in the film also play a nice game as when the murders happen the sound goes blank.

Rating:  The film is actually not bad for something that I thought would have a monster movie. But yet again it is a more of murder mystery than a horror film even though the energy of the film is very dark. The plot and aspect of the film did not make sense what’s so ever but the characters were well acted and written so it can be forgiven.

5/10 Beers!

Yacker

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