Tag Archives: Jaume Collet-Serra

House of Wax (2005)

House of Wax (2005)

Country:  USA

Director: Jaume Collet-Serra

Main Stars: Chad Michael Murray, Paris Hilton, Elisha Cuthbert

Storyline:  A group of teens get stranded near and wax museum and try to fight for their lives against an unknown killer.

mv5bnda4nzg1njq2nv5bml5banbnxkftztcwmdywntgymq__v1_ux182_cr00182268_al_Review (Spoils):  A group of friends were on their way to a football game and they come across car trouble (suprise!) so they end up in a nearby town called Ambrose which is known for its House of Wax. Well the town is actually pretty deserted and they learn the story of the Sinclairs that use to run the House of Wax from the friendly mechanic. This leads also that the teens already pissed someone off the night before while camping and it could of possibly lead the car issue and now all of them slowly disappearing and getting killed.

Another remake to hit the site and yet another film is not that great. Annoying teens from Hollywood and some typical trash such as broken down vehicles and strangers that do not talk but come back and cause shit and of and the charming stranger from the strange town that seems too friendly. Lots of melted wax on skin, some stabbings, a couple slices, a metal pole impaling (yeah…cheered on this one) and strange storyline. This was too polished by Hollywood and was such a mix bag from the original.

Rating: First off you known your horror films are going to suck if you have Paris Hilton in it…come on. That tips the bar of being a remake to begin with; even the beautiful Elisha Cuthbert cannot save the film from that. Poor Vincent Price would be rolling in his grave.

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3/10 Beers!

Yacker

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Orphan (2009)

Orphan (2009)

Country:  USA

Director: Jaume Collet-Serra

Main Stars: Vera Farminga, Peter Sarsgaard, Isabelle Fuhrman

Storyline:  A new couple adopt a nine year old girl and their life becomes Hell.

MV5BMTU0NjQzNjg2Nl5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwNzc3NzA0Mg@@__V1_UX182_CR0,0,182,268_AL_Review (Spoils): A young couple are working on their marriage as it fell apart after the loss of a baby. This lead to heavy drinking and lots of fighting so they decide to adopt a young Russian girl from an orphanage. They still have one existing children named Daniel and Little Max who is not much for the change and the new daughter Esther (Isabelle Fuhrman). The mother Kate (Vera Farminga) seems to feel that not everything is quite as it seems with young Esther and this starts the fighting again in their marriage.

We have some tough topics in this film right off the bat such as the loss of a baby, drinking and of course stress on the marriage front. Nothing was going to patch this family up except the adoption of new child. We have the young talented Esther who is wow the parents from the get go but something is not right with the way she dresses (ribbons), loves the old arts and does not mind killing a bird. We have possessed screams, a nasty hammer to the head, some pushing, arm breaking, stabbing, gun shots, some messed up mind games and the ending starts to go over the top.

Rating: If you’re looking for a nasty little child terror film this one is not bad. I have to say I was not expecting much with this film as Hollywood tries to ruin everything but this film is dark and nasty. It’s like a more modern version of the Bad Seed but with a twist. It’s a very uncomfortable film as it deals with children being twisted to drive the parent’s nuts and this Esther is one messed up bitch.

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7/10 Beers!

Yacker

 

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