Tag Archives: Texas Chainsaw Massacre

Texas Chainsaw 3D (2013)

Texas Chainsaw 3D (2013)

Country: USA

Director: John Luessenhop

Main Stars: Alexandra Daddario, Tania Raymonde, Scott Eastwood, Gunnar Hansen

Storyline: After the burning of the original house of the cannibals of 1974 a lone baby grows up to learn her heritage.

MV5BMTQzMzAyNTE2N15BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwNzM1NDg2OA@@._V1_SX214_AL_Review (Spoils): The Sawyer family get caught in 1974 after the survivor escapes. The town and sheriff go and attack and burn the Sawyer house. A lone baby named Heather get rescued from the family during this to grow up and learn that she is living with her true parents after she inherits the house.

I’m a diehard Texas Chainsaw series fan (its right up there after Friday the 13th) and I was excited about this film. Sadly there are two major issues with it that are so major that this should of never got pass the writers table. But first the good…

First I love that Leatherface is done by Gunnar Hansen again…awesome. Love the intro which is an ode to the original film (still the best of the whole series). The gore and blood was well done I was surprised even though to be true Texas Chainsaw film you should rely on it. But I did enjoy the saw body slice and the meat chopper was a nice touch.

Now for the bad…. the very bad. How the fuck this got past the writers table I have no idea. We have the flashback ode the film and the first scene we have suddenly 4-6 new people in the house in the shoot out that were not in the original film. No explanation who they are, why they are there…what the fuck!

Ok even worse than that, is the time warp! This was 1974, the daughter is 18 years old in 2012! Do you think we are stupid and not care about these massive glitches because they have a nice set of tits? We are not fucking stupid. A really cheesy reason to throw a couple of hot chicks in the film instead of having the main character in her 40s-50s like it should have been. Shame on the writer and shame on John Luessenhop for letting that slide to make this almost or just as bad as the cross dressing Leatherface of part 4. You are idiots! You destroyed what might have been a good film with that stupid decision. Epic Fail!

Rating: Well there it is. A great film that went to shit within the first 10min. This could have been a great film as the idea was there and so was Gunnar Hansen but you screwed it with a lack of explanations and a couple set of tits. Let’s hope the series revives itself somehow from the time wrap.

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4/10 Beers!

Yacker

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Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3 (1990)

Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3 (1990)

Country: USA

Director:  Jeff Burr

Main Stars: Kate Hodge, Ken Foree, R.A Mihailoff, Viggo Mortensen

Storyline:  A couple run away from a threatening gas attendant and get lost in the back roads of Texas. The Sawyer family are back….

leatherface_texas_chainsaw_massacre

 

 

 

 

 

 

Review (Spoils):  The saw is back and this film is to be a sequel of the first one and ignoring the second one. I disagree as Stretch makes a quick appearance in the beginning so to be this is right after. We have new family members to join Leatherface (R.A Mihailoff ) we have Mama Sawyer, Eddie “Tex” Sawyer (Viggo Mortensen) , Alfredo Sawyer, Tinker Sawyer and last and not least Leatherface’s daughter. Seeing the last movie ended with a bang we have Leatherface with a leg brace. This family is a little different from the other films they use chainsaw yes but they are cleaner and they trap their prey. We learn that have raped their victims (discarding them after child birth) and that’s who the family expands. An example is the little creepy blond girl that is Leatherface’s daughter that reminds me of the girl from The Bad Seed.  Some of the memorable moments are the cowboy ranger boy Tex, Leatherface fighting the spelling toy, the little girl and the sledgehammer scene.

Some of down points of the film is how many version there really is of this film as it has been cut and rated so many times. Another point is Leatherface being called Junior now instead of Bubba like the past films.  I miss the Leatherface that is a confused child in a man’s body character. The film can be hit and miss when it comes to story also.

Rating: We have Viggo Mortensen on film before his big Lord of the Rings series, we have the Sawyer family back and there are worse films in the series than this one. Sure it’s not the greatest but there are worse ones to come. Just wish they would have stuck with the original feel of Leatherface. Remember people “Saw is Family”

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5/10 Beers!

Yacker

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