Mandy (2018)

Mandy (2018)

Country: USA

Director:  Panos Cosmatos

Main Stars:  Nicolas Cage, Andrea Riseborough, Casper Kelly, Linus Roache, Ned Dennehy, Olwn Fouere, Richard Brake, Bill Duke, Line Pillet, Alexis Julemonth, Hayley Saywell,

Storyline:  A strange LSD cult attacks a man and his wife at their log cabin.

Review (Spoils):    Red and Mandy (Nicolas Cage, Andrea Riseborough) live the good life away from most people up in the woods and under the stars. Very simple life and in love. When a crazed cult lead by a leader named Jeremiah and his family come across Mandy, they of course go to try to recruit her. When all fails and things turn for the worse for the couple Red shows his Cage personality for revenge and off, we go!

We have blood, Hellraiser like bikers, a crazy looney LSD tripping cult family that reminds me of something from the Sawyers. Of course, Cage being nutty Cage, which is always fun, trippy visuals, burnings, spear into the mouth, arrows, porn, a penis shot, cocaine, axe to the head, chainsaw duel, blood sprays and some over the top head crushing. The build up leads to the gore.

Rating:  Take the strange Manson family, mix it up with Hellraiser and a nice touch of drugs and Nicolas Cage, this is what you get.  A trippy drug infused Cage film with some blood. Some very fun over the top scenes like the typical Cage mind snap, chainsaw battle and the final scene leaves this to be a classic Cage horror type film. Was I overly impressed not overly but its classic Cage and the visuals of the film are very entertaining.  Worth checking out….

6/10 Beers!

Yacker

The Exorcist: Believer (2023)

The Exorcist: Believer (2023)

Country: USA

Director:  David Gordon Green

Main Stars:  Leslie Odom Jr., Tracey Graves, Lidya Jewett, Danny McCarthy, Ann Dowd, Olivia O’Neill, Norah Murphy, Jennifer Nettles, Elle Burstyn, Linda Blair

Storyline:  Two young girls start to play with things they do not understand to talk to one of their deceased moms which leads to the young girls going missing and found possessed.

Review (Spoils):  We flash back into a storyline around the big earthquake in Haiti and it brings us to present day. The storyline around the two girls works and off they go to play with the occult alone in the woods. They never to return until found many miles away and have forgotten everything. The film up to this point is working even when they start to show exact signs of Regan back in her famous hay day. The single father to help his daughter decides hey why not go find Regan’s mom and have her shoe the demon away cause it makes sense and everything including the story goes to shit…

The make up of the demon girls is actually not bad, we have shaking beds, green puke, cursing girls with crucifixes, peeing, bleeding, scratch marks, sore feet, nasty eye gouges, a couple jumps but not enough to make the cheesy demon smoke and lack of actual deaths to save the film.

Rating:  Was not sure what to expect from this movie as the series has been very hit and miss since the first film. Was kind of excited of the nod to the first film with characters return but got left disappointed. This film started off strong and went 100% sideways with the introduction of the mother from the first film. What in the fuck would she try to be the hero, she is not tied the religious systems what the hell was she going to do? Totally dumb scenes and this just blew the storyline into wow this dumb.  This film was bad enough with the copycat idea of the first film they did not need to worth it out the window with the Elle Burstyn character trying to be a hero. Christ she could not save her own daughter Regan what the hell was she going to do with these two girls. Just fucking dumb! First hour was interesting and then it just went flush!

3/10 Beers!

Yacker

Paranormal Activity: Next of Kin (2021)

Paranormal Activity: Next of Kin (2021)

Country: USA

Director:  William Eubank

Main Stars:  Emily Bader, Kirby Johnson, Jaye Ayres-Brown, Dan Lippert, Roland Buck III, Ari Notartomaso

Storyline: A teen finds out that her mom was part of Amish group and bring a camera team to get some background of her family’s past.

Review (Spoils):   Margo (Emily Bader) finds out that her mom was part of Amish community at one time before she got pregnant from an outsider. So, what is better than grabbing some friends with a boom stick and camera and join the community and ask questions and record.  When the arrive they not overly greeted and learn about the strange rituals the community has and secrets that nobody talks about. Oh, and ton of basic jump out options along the way of the documentary.

Lots of semi lame jump out moments, very interesting songs and rituals, a doll with no face, annoying teens who record like everything, a girl who has no idea what a farm is really like look at all the cows and pigs. (it’s not a lot at all), devil marks in blood, Blair Witch camera feel, bed crunch, old mysterious church, 2 headed goat, sacrifice pit, typical floor drag, castle freak beast, blood slashing, meat hook, fire, mob, and the magical snowstorm that disappears in the same scene.

Rating:  Zero idea how this series went from hauntings to an occult feel this film just does not fit the series at all.  Really this film is Blair Witch meets The Witch if I had to nail it down with a bunch of silly recording people making dumb decisions. Like they thought the snooping and action would end well.  This film has also a hard time to decide if it wants to be a straight movie or a found footage. The film is watchable but not relatable to the series and very confusing on really what is happening and why.

4/10 Beers!

Yacker

A Classic Horror Story (2021)

A Classic Horror Story (2021)

Country: Italy

Director:  Roberto De Feo, Paolo Strippoli

Main Stars: Matilda Anna Ingrid Lutz, Francesco Russo, Peppino Mazzotta, Yuliia Sobol, Cristina Donadio, Mellanie Hubert

Storyline: A group of young people take a RV ride, and it crashes into a mysterious forest, and they slowly become captured.

Review (Spoils):  A bunch of young people carpool in motorhome RV being driven by a wanna be film maker. They suddenly crash into a tree to miss a goat. After that each one of them start to be become captured by a strange, masked cult. What is with the cult that the mysterious A frame house.

This film leads a few nodes I think to classic like Texas Chainsaw Massacre and even the classic Lucio Fulci and other classic horrors. For that alone it worked well and the masks on the cult are well done including the horror. No real teenage annoying characters in this one, its eerie and right to the point.

We have masked killers, eyes being cut out, eyes being punched out by a vice, cutting of tongues, a nice wicker man feel, nailed to the chair classic dinner table nod to Texas Chainsaw Massacre, gunshot, a head blown and a nasty down right foot blow that makes Misery seem a bit tame.  Sure, the characters are not in depth but no need for that when it’s a fun gory time. Bring on the odes and bring on the blood.

Rating:  Normally I get upset when films steal too much but this one from the title, I believe was to be that and I enjoyed it. The music was well done, and the gore was awesome…. None of that computer cheap crap.  The cult itself was fine and the twist was not surprising, but it was a fun film, and we need more like this.

7/10 Beers!

Yacker

The Omega Man (1971)

The Omega Man (1971)

Country: USA

Director:  Boris Sagal

Main Stars: Charlton Heston, Anthony Zerbem Rosalind Cash, Paul Koslo, Eric Laneuville, Brian Tochi

Storyline:  A lone man survives the worlds pandemic and much face the deformed survivors.

Review (Spoils):  Much like the classic of I Am Legend, or the classic film of Vincent Price, The Last Man on Earth this time we haveCharlton Heston battling not apes but albino vampire like undead that became when the massive pandemic overtook the world. Being a scientist, he survived as he had the final formula right before it got destroyed.  While changing outfits and loving life alone much like a Dawn of the Dead type feel he comes across another adult human woman who has more style than Jackie Brown …man!

This film is a trip on its own and a classic! We have tons of nods to classic films and novels. Did it age well hell fuck no but it was fun! The vibe is cooler than anything that has grown out of the 70s sleaze of groove and it’s a trip man. We have a cult like tribe that hates light that survived a new pandemic disease, and they want to destroy the one human that could save them all. As we come across a foxy lady who just happens to have children that could bring back a new dawn of the human species this movie spins. Lots of breasts, groovy slang, pale vampires, great white eyes, screams, end of the world scenes, red blood like the classic 70s European films, symbolism and just a fun dan film. Yes, this a classic but falls under the black exploitation of horror of the 70s…. but still a classic on its own.

Rating:  This film was whacked on a drug level of groove but held the classic feel that you knew it came from. Omega Man is a classic cult title and the roots come from its own classic novel tale. Spin that in a 70s creep albino cult of the undead and here you have it. You add Charlton Heston and Rosalind Cash can it go wrong?

6/10 Beers!

Yacker

Mata Batin II /The Third Eye II (2019)

Mata Batin II /The Third Eye II (2019)

Country: Indonesia

Director:  Rocky Soraya

Main Stars: Jessica Mila, Nabilah Ratna Ayu Azalia, Sophia Latijuba, Jermey Thomas, Biana Hello, Citra Prima

Storyline: Yet again the family is being plagues with the special gift they have were they see ghosts.

Review (Spoils):  A mysterious ghost named Mirah has been following the sisters Alia and Abel for some time now. Akia takes it too far and wants to help the spirit by dwelling into its past and asks Mrs. Windu for help. All this yet unleashes as nasty ghost that keeps possessing people as they attack one another until it is put to rest.

Going to just get right to the punch on this one as it’s the second of a series and pretty much the same damn thing but worse.  We have a spirit again haunting everyone that has the special gift called the third eye. As the spirit bounces and gives us the decent special effects make up much like Evil Dead. Nothing really new here as we have gore and crazy demon possessed special effects again. Sure, the film series is gory with lots of nail gashes in skin and everyone face during into a demon and floating around. But the plot is the same damn thing again this time it gets worse.

Rating:  Not too sure how and why this series is still going but it is. This one is pretty much the same damn thing as the first one except when Mrs. Windu comes in, we have a nice cheezy scene of ghosts from the first film making a special appearance and just one lining the evil to rest as they walk back to the bright light of Heaven. (dear god make me barf….. I literally had to rewatch the part as its mind blowing to cop out on the story). Not just that we even have poor zombie face Mirah being walked to a well of flame which is Hell. Yes this film actual is worse than the first one. Please just stop!

3/10 Beers!

Yacker

The Void (2016)

The Void (2016)

Country: Canada

Director:  Steven Kostanski, Jeremy Gillespie

Main Stars:  Aaron-Poole, Kenneth Welsh, Ellen Wong, Kathleen Munroe, Daniel Fathers

Storyline:  A group gets trapped at a hospital as a strange creatures start to appear with a cult with hooded robes.

Review (Spoils):  The plot is pretty basic something has changed in the world as we follow a man into a hospital who ends up being trapped with various individuals all with different backgrounds. As the night progress we have people in hooded robes appearing outside the building and everyone is panicked. For some odd reason there is a like an alien like disease spreading my biting or death which changes the human body into strange monstrous beasts that spread. What is the connection between the cult and the beasts?

We will never know as the holes in this plot is kind of crazy but if you’re just looking for a cool special effects and gross film it is all right. We have lots of burning bodies, car wrecks, more gunshots than you can count, lots of The Thing like special effects creatures, slime, axes, conflict, deformities, crazy cult and strange prophecies

Rating:  Think Lovecraft meets The Thing which is really not that far off to begin with. Even after the film I was kind of lost yes, I get it its from another plane but really why did it just all begin. We have the great black pyramid to represent the other side and that there is a new way of defeating death in a deformed gross way. The film has a ton of holes in the storyline plot but as a special effects low budget film it was okay to run through…. Would I do it again prob not.

5/10 Beers!

Yacker

Black Christmas (2019)

Black Christmas (2019)

Country: USA

Director:  Sophia Takal

Main Stars:  Imogen Poots, Aleyse Shannon, Lily Donoghue, Brittany O’Gradey, Caleb Eberhardt, Cary Elwes

Storyline:  Murders are happening on campus to young women during the Christmas break.  

Review (Spoils):  Sort of like the first classic the story takes place on campus as people are starting to take off for Christmas break.  Its snowing as the college drama is happening with the young ones and someone is in a black robe with a mask texting young girls and killing them. As the break’s kicks into high gear, we learn that a small group of girls are working… kind of together to make a different with sexism and human rights within the campus. Along at the same time there is some backstabbing, a loner stalker boy (prob the creepiest of the bunch) and random text messages as young girls start to disappear.

We have Christmas lights, bag over the head, annoying characters (kind of was cheering for the killer in black at one point), a icicle stabbing, black blood, stabbings, bow and arrows (don’t get it), fire, broken neck, sexy Christmas outfits, stalkers, lots of robes and masks.

Rating:  Remake of a remake yet again…. But this time its not as painful. The original just cannot be touched as it just a classic and to be honest these remakes do need to stop at some point. At least this one tries to do something new and it kind of works but would have worked better as a different title. This could have had a better horror film on its own without trying to cash in on the Black Christmas title. Sure, there was a nice bag over the head ode to the original film but the whole idea is really not related except for Christmas.  But the storyline was a nice concept even though a few of the characters were annoying. No Billy …… no large amount of beers from me.

5/10 Beers!

Yacker

Killer Under the Bed (2018)

Killer Under the Bed (2018)

Country: USA

Director:  Jeff Hare

Main Stars:  Kristy Swanson, Brec Bassinger, Madison Lawlor, Chris Prascus, Ashlee Fuss, Kristin Carey

Storyline:  After the death of her father a young teen find an ugly doll underneath her bed that grants her needs.

Review (Spoils):  After the tragic death of her husband Sarah (Kristy Swanson) and her two daughters (Brec Bassinger, Madison Lawlor) move into a new home. Not long after seeing a riff between the two teenage daughters and the youngest one discovers a doll hanging in garage. When taking the doll down and removing a bunch of pins it turns out this is some type of voodoo doll.  Being the great sister, she is Kilee uses the doll as a test on her elder sister Chrissy to see if it works. After the discovery of the powers, she now has with this doll she starts to alter the outcomes of her life and those around her until the doll decides it has had enough.

Do not expect gore and a lot of blood and great special effects but the story in general was interesting enough. We have a pretty crappy looking doll that seems to hold sometime of demon within and it is very hard to control if it has been cut down and unpinned. The editing between scenes was pretty cut and dry like a television film and so was the action but it was watchable as I have seen a hell of a lot worse, but it does not hurt when Kristy Swanson and Madison Lawlor are on the screen.

The doll brings us lots of teen drama, lot of pins, leg cramps, a creepy stalking crush from a teacher, fat lips, a near nasty dentist scene, some knockouts, burning dolls, a terrible special effect of a head twitching and a off camera knife attack which would have been cool to seen.

Rating:  Personally, did not know much about this film at all before watching it which helped, and my expectations were already low. So, this little film surprised me. I like that it was what a length of film should be 1.5 mark and even if it was lacking in money and editing the story was ok. Like I said before it really helped the film for me when Kristy Swanson and Madison Lawlor was on the screens also.

5/10 Beers!

Yacker

La Marca del Demonio / Mark of the Devil (2020)

La Marca del Demonio / Mark of the Devil (2020)

Country: Mexico

Director:  Diego Cohen

Main Stars:  Eduardo Noriega, Eivaut Rischen, Arantza Ruiz, Nicolasa Ortiz Monasterio

Storyline:  A demon hunter and a priest are on a mission to rid the earth of evil, but they may have met their match with a young woman.

Review (Spoils):  The movie kicks into high gear from the start with an elderly priest trying to save a young boy who is over the top possessed by a demon or the devil. This leads a nasty death, some cool effects and than a flash ahead to modern times. We have a young family who dad is just kind of there, the mom is a over the top bitch who studies ancient texts and two young sister who are smoking hot. Through some basic setting the character development up the young girls along with some lame boyfriend decide to read some of the Latin (because you know everyone can read this text) from one her moms books and shit starts to get weird.

 The film itself was a little much for me on the storyline as it tries to bring the intro also into the now where we have a shady greasy demon hunter (Eivaut Rischen) and a priest who is an addict working together as they exorcize demons within the area. This part of the story really does not work, and it lame in a way. Sure, the idea could of worked if the character was development of the demon hunter Karl was different now this dirty black jacket cowboy looking thing. The priest was alright and a nice touch.

We have lots of black eyes, floating bodies, tons of black goo and blood spitting, head smashing, some of the scene head smashing and lots of throwing around against walls. We even have a nice bare ass shot of Karl but unfortunately nothing from the leading ladies.

Rating:  A did not hate this film unlike the reviews I am now seeing online. The special effects were not bad for this type of budget film except maybe the burning fire thing in the chest was bad CGI. The mother was a total pointless bitch in the film and when her time came to be honest it could have been sooner. Like mentioned above the whole demon hunter thing was lame and did not work and really did take away from what would have been a better film. The main actresses Arantza Rui and Nicolasa Ortiz Monasterio were okay actresses but I could watch them on the screen all night. The film was short and near the end was like ok lets just wrap this up now it seemed so its too bad as there could have been more to this storyline with the young girls than just sleeping and wrecking havoc in the final 10min. I personally will give it higher beers for the special effects and Arantza Rui and Nicolasa Ortiz alone.

5/10 Beers!

Yacker